Ashwin Lewis
Sleep training is a challenging process for both parents and children, and it is not uncommon for parents to struggle with implementing it. While some parents swear by sleep training, others believe it is harmful. Sleep training does not always work, and it is important to be aware of potential pitfalls and alternatives. Common issues include inconsistencies in the sleep training plan, incorrect methods for the child's age or temperament, and sleep associations, such as feeding or rocking the child to sleep. It is crucial for parents to be educated about their child's sleep needs and to seek professional advice if needed.
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What You'll Learn
- Sleep training may not be working because it's not the best fit for your baby
- It's important to be educated on how much sleep your child needs and what a typical daily schedule should look like
- Nighttime is the best time to start sleep training
- Avoid feeding your baby too close to sleep times
- If sleep training isn't working, call your paediatrician
Sleep training may not be working because it's not the best fit for your baby
Additionally, the "drowsy but awake" method recommended in many sleep-expert books may not be suitable for babies past the newborn stage. This method can be too similar to a baby who is already asleep, and once a baby is older than four months, it's important that they learn to fall asleep independently from a wide-awake (but calm) state. If a baby is put down when they are already drowsy, they will associate falling asleep with those conditions and will need you to recreate them when they wake up.
It's also important to consider the whole 24 hours of sleep and not just bedtime. Babies' sleep needs, how long they should be awake at any given time, and what a typical daily schedule should look like, vary depending on their age. For example, after six to nine months, most children don't need calories at night, and night feeds can interfere with their learning of how to sleep. However, it's important to talk to your paediatrician first to assess the baby's age and weight before deciding to cut out night feeds.
Finally, sleep training usually works in 3-7 days for younger children, and if you are stuck after this period of time, it may be best to call your paediatrician. For about 20% of babies, sleep training just doesn't work, and your child may not be ready due to reasons such as their age, separation anxiety, or underlying medical issues.
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It's important to be educated on how much sleep your child needs and what a typical daily schedule should look like
Sleep training is a challenging process, and it's important to remember that it may not work for about 20% of babies. Before implementing a sleep training plan, it is crucial to educate yourself on the amount of sleep your child needs, how long they should be awake at any given time, and what a typical daily schedule should look like for their age. Here are some insights to help you navigate this process:
Understanding Sleep Needs
Firstly, recognize that sleep needs vary with age. For example, newborns (0-4 months) should be put down when they are drowsy but awake, while after the 16-week mark, it's essential to let them fall asleep independently from a wide-awake but calm state. Older babies and toddlers may need different approaches, such as gradually transitioning to falling asleep on their own. Understanding these age-specific needs is vital for effective sleep training.
Creating a Daily Schedule
A typical daily schedule for a child should include consistent nap times and a bedtime routine. For instance, if your child is napping in a stroller, carrier, or car, it might be more effective to have them nap at home. A consistent bedtime routine can also make a difference, such as ensuring a 20-minute gap between feeding and bedtime to avoid reinforcing the association between eating and sleeping.
Addressing Sleep Associations
Sleep associations, such as rocking, cuddling, or nursing your baby to sleep, can become a crutch and hinder their ability to fall asleep independently. It's important to break these associations by ensuring your child is awake but calm before sleep. If there is a strong nursing association, it may be helpful to enlist the non-nursing parent to put the baby down for a few nights.
Consistency and Patience
Consistency is key when sleep training. Both parents must stick to the plan, and it's beneficial to ensure that daycare providers understand the importance of nap consistency as well. It's also important to remember that sleep training usually works within 3-7 days for younger children, and it may take a few nights for the crying to subside. If you're stuck after this period, consider consulting a pediatrician or sleep consultant for personalized advice.
Remember, every child is unique, and different methods work better for different ages and temperaments. Be patient, flexible, and open to trying various techniques to find what suits your child's needs best.
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Nighttime is the best time to start sleep training
Sleep training can be a challenging process, and it's normal to encounter setbacks and obstacles along the way. If you're finding that sleep training isn't working, it's important to remember that you're not alone, and there are several adjustments you can make to improve your chances of success.
Firstly, it's important to recognise that nighttime is the best time to start sleep training. During the day, babies can easily fight sleep and stay awake, but at night, their drive to sleep becomes overwhelming, and they are more likely to transition from 'wake' to 'sleep' easily. This natural circadian rhythm, or biological clock, works in your favour when establishing healthy sleep habits.
Secondly, ensure that you are well-educated about your child's sleep needs. Understand how much sleep they require, how long they should be awake at any given time, and what a typical daily schedule should look like for their age. This knowledge will empower you to make informed decisions about your sleep training approach.
Additionally, examine your current sleep training methods and consider whether they are the best fit for your baby. For example, some parents prefer to be physically close to their child as they fall asleep, while others may find that their presence distracts or overstimulates their baby. Different methods work for different ages and temperaments, so it's important to be flexible and adapt your approach as needed.
Furthermore, evaluate your bedtime routine and make adjustments as necessary. Avoid feeding your baby too close to bedtime, as this can reinforce the association between eating and sleeping. Instead, leave a gap of around 20 minutes between the last feed and bedtime. It's also important to ensure that your baby falls asleep independently, without the aid of a pacifier or other sleep props, as these can hinder their ability to self-soothe.
Remember, sleep training usually works within 3-7 days for younger children, and the crying should subside within one to two nights. If you're consistently encountering challenges, don't be afraid to seek professional advice from a pediatrician or sleep consultant, who can provide personalised guidance and support.
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Avoid feeding your baby too close to sleep times
Sleep training can be a challenging process, and it's important to remember that different methods work for different babies. One common pitfall to avoid is feeding your baby too close to their sleep times.
Firstly, it's important to establish a good breastfeeding routine. If you're breastfeeding, it's normal for your baby to doze off during a feed, especially in the early weeks. Continue feeding until your baby is full or has fallen asleep. However, as your baby grows, they will need fewer night feeds and may be able to sleep for longer stretches. Gradually reducing night feeds can be a part of sleep training, and it's important to do this strategically. Consult your paediatrician to assess your baby's age and weight, and consider enlisting the help of the non-nursing parent to put the baby to bed, at least for the first few nights of sleep training.
Secondly, it's beneficial to establish a consistent bedtime routine. This can include calmer activities such as reading, which signal to your baby that it's time to wind down and prepare for sleep. Try to avoid too much excitement or stimulation just before bedtime, as this can make it harder for your baby to settle.
Additionally, be mindful of your baby's sleep environment. Keep the room at a comfortable temperature, as overheating can disturb sleep and increase the risk of SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome). Use layers of lightweight blankets or a well-fitting baby sleeping bag to adjust the temperature. Also, consider using a dummy at the start of sleep, as this may reduce the risk of SIDS, although the evidence for this is not strong, and not all experts agree.
Remember, sleep training is a gradual process, and it may take time to see results. Different methods work for different babies, so it's important to be patient and flexible. If you're concerned about your baby's sleep or your own fatigue, don't hesitate to reach out to your healthcare provider or seek support from family and friends.
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If sleep training isn't working, call your paediatrician
Sleep training is a challenging process, and it may not always work for your baby. If you've tried different methods and nothing seems to work, don't be afraid to call your paediatrician for advice and support. They can help assess your baby's health, age, and weight to provide tailored recommendations.
Baby's Health and Development
Your baby's health and development play a crucial role in their sleep patterns. By consulting a paediatrician, you can ensure that there are no underlying medical issues, such as reflux, that could be impacting their sleep. They can also advise on the appropriate sleep training methods for your baby's age and developmental stage. For example, younger babies may need a very gentle and gradual transition to falling asleep on their own.
Sleep Associations
Sleep training may not be working if your baby has strong sleep associations, such as nursing or feeding right before bedtime. A paediatrician can provide guidance on how to break these associations and establish a bedtime routine that promotes independent sleep. They can also advise on the appropriate number of feeds and calories your baby needs at night, helping you gradually reduce night feeds if necessary.
Parenting Techniques
Different parenting techniques can impact the effectiveness of sleep training. For instance, some parents may prefer to hover over the crib and shush their baby to sleep, while others may opt for a more hands-off approach. A paediatrician can offer insights into what methods may work best for your baby's temperament and provide guidance on how to implement them effectively.
Sleep Environment
The sleep environment is crucial for successful sleep training. If your baby shares a room with a sibling, a paediatrician may recommend temporarily moving the sibling to facilitate training. They can also advise on lighting and electronic usage in the bedroom, ensuring the environment is optimised for restful sleep.
Consistency and Commitment
Sleep training requires consistency and commitment from both parents. A paediatrician can provide support and accountability to ensure you stick to the sleep training plan. They can also offer guidance on how to handle setbacks or challenges that may arise during the process.
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Frequently asked questions
If sleep training isn't working, it could be because the method you're using isn't suitable for your baby. Different methods work better for different ages and temperaments. For example, some babies need a lot of soothing and a parent nearby, while others are too distracted by their parents' presence. If you're unsure, it's best to consult a pediatrician or sleep consultant.
One common mistake is reinforcing the association between eating and sleeping. It's best to leave a gap of around 20 minutes between the last feed and bedtime. Another mistake is putting your baby down with a pacifier, as they may become dependent on it to fall asleep.
It's important to remember that sleep training may not always result in your baby sleeping through the night. It's normal for babies to wake up one to two times a night, even after sleep training. If your baby is waking up a lot, try to identify any underlying sleep associations that may be causing this, such as rocking or feeding to sleep.
Sleep training usually works within 3-7 days in younger children. If you've been trying for longer than this and it's still not working, it may be best to consult a pediatrician or sleep consultant for advice.
Yes, it's important to consider your baby's environment. For example, if they share a room with a sibling, temporary separation may facilitate training. Also, ensure the room is dimly lit and free from electronic devices, as these can disrupt sleep.
