Herbie Murray
Deciding whether to let your baby cry it out is a highly debated topic among parents and experts. The cry-it-out (CIO) method is a sleep-training strategy that involves preparing your baby for the night and letting them cry themselves to sleep without parental intervention. While some parents swear by this method, others believe that letting a baby cry is harmful. Research and expert opinions vary, with some suggesting that it is okay to let babies cry for short periods, while others recommend waiting until babies are at least 4 months old and weigh at least 11 pounds before considering sleep training. Ultimately, the decision to use the CIO method depends on individual circumstances, parental comfort levels, and what works best for the baby and the family.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Cry-it-out method | Leaving the baby to cry without parental intervention until they fall asleep |
| Age | Babies younger than 4 months old do not have established sleep cycles yet. Research suggests CIO methods may be ineffective before 6 months old. |
| Baby's health | If the baby is sick, has a developmental delay, or has reflux, it is not advisable to let them cry it out. |
| Parental comfort | How long a baby is left to cry will depend on the method chosen and the parent's comfort level. |
| Bedtime routine | A consistent and predictable bedtime routine helps the baby feel secure and content before sleeping. |
| Gradual approach | Gradual changes, such as reducing the amount of support provided over time, can be more effective than stopping immediately. |
| Self-soothing | Babies can develop the ability to self-soothe from around 6 months old, but they still need caregivers to help ease their distress. |
| Parental involvement | Higher parental involvement approaches, such as "pick up put down," may be more suitable for younger babies (around 4 months old). |
| Alternatives | Gentler sleep training approaches, such as camping out and parental education, can also be effective in improving sleep for babies and parents. |
| Benefits | Sleep training can help babies sleep for longer periods at night and improve parents' moods and sleep patterns. |
| Drawbacks | Some research suggests that not responding to a baby's cries may negatively impact secure attachment and the ability to regulate feelings later in life. |
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What You'll Learn
The Cry It Out (CIO) method
The CIO method is not intended to be cruel but rather to be used as an intentional tool to teach your baby self-soothing techniques. It is important to note that the CIO method has not been found to be harmful to babies. There is no evidence to show that children will have any social or emotional issues or resentment toward their parents later in life for letting them cry for a few minutes at night-time. However, some parents and healthcare providers feel that the CIO method is too rigid, mean, and stressful for both parents and babies.
There are various methods within the CIO approach. The most well-known one is likely Richard Ferber's graduated extinction model, which suggests starting when the baby is at least six months old. "Graduated" means that parents are encouraged to put their babies to bed when they are drowsy but still awake. The baby is then allowed to fuss or cry for gradually longer periods of time before the parent soothes them. Another method is full extinction, which involves placing the baby in their crib and letting them cry until they fall asleep without any parental intervention.
The length of time you choose to let your baby cry during sleep training depends on the method you choose and your comfort level. It is recommended that you do not let newborns cry it out and that sleep training should start no earlier than 16 weeks. The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommends waiting until your baby is at least four months old, and some research suggests that the effects of CIO are most lasting after six months. However, other sources suggest that CIO can be started as early as five to six weeks of age.
It is important to remember that every baby is different, and learning to self-soothe and sleep may take longer for some. It is crucial to stay consistent and follow the plan you have chosen. CIO training may not be suitable for all babies and families, and experts have mixed opinions on whether or when to use it. Understanding your baby's cues and maintaining a consistent bedtime routine are key to success.
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When to start sleep training
Sleep training is a tool that can help teach your child to fall asleep without your assistance. However, it is not recommended for newborns as they are not developmentally able to self-soothe and their sleep patterns are immature.
Some sources suggest that babies are often ready to begin sleep training at about 4 months old, as their sleep cycles begin to mature, and their circadian rhythm starts to take effect. However, the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommends waiting until your baby is at least 6 months old, as babies younger than 4 months old don't have established sleep cycles yet. Additionally, babies under 4 months are expected to wake overnight for feedings and comfort and often require help to fall asleep and stay asleep.
Some parents start sleep training their babies at 4 months old, while others wait until 6 months or even later. It is important to consider your child's development and readiness when deciding when to start sleep training. Some signs that your baby is ready for sleep training include evidence of being able to self-soothe and a consistent sleep schedule.
Regardless of when you start sleep training, it is important to have a consistent bedtime routine. This can include activities such as reading a book, singing a lullaby, or giving your baby a bath. A good bedtime routine can help your baby recognize when it is time to wind down and relax, making it easier for them to fall asleep independently.
There are also various methods of sleep training that you can consider, such as the "cry-it-out" method or gentler approaches like camping out and parental education. The "cry-it-out" method involves letting your baby cry for a certain amount of time before falling asleep, while gentler methods focus on gradually reducing parental intervention and encouraging your baby to fall asleep independently. Ultimately, the decision of when to start sleep training and which method to use depends on you, your family, and your baby's temperament.
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Gentler sleep training approaches
There are a variety of gentler sleep training approaches that can be just as effective as the cry-it-out method. These approaches can be tailored to suit the needs of your baby and your family. Here are some strategies to consider:
The Ferber Method
The Ferber method, also known as the fading method, is a popular sleep training technique that allows you to gradually reduce your baby's reliance on parental intervention to fall asleep. This method involves placing your baby in their crib when they are tired but still awake and then leaving the room. You can then re-enter the room at designated intervals to provide reassurance without picking them up. For example, you can check in after three minutes, five minutes, 10 minutes, and so on. This technique helps your baby learn to fall asleep independently while still receiving comfort and support from you.
Gradual Adjustment of Sleep and Feeding Schedule
Making careful adjustments to your baby's sleep and feeding schedule can be a gentle and effective way to improve their sleep. If your baby is waking up too early, you may need to adjust their bedtime later. Night waking may indicate a need for more daytime feedings, allowing you to meet their nutritional needs during the day and promote longer sleep at night.
Camping Out
The "camping out" technique involves staying with your baby in their room until they fall asleep. You can gradually move further away from their crib each night until you are eventually outside the room. This method provides a gentle transition for your baby, as they feel your presence and support while learning to fall asleep independently.
Parental Education
Educating yourself about infant sleep patterns and age-appropriate sleep expectations can be incredibly helpful. Understanding the typical sleep development milestones and the changes that occur over time can guide your sleep training approach and help you tailor it to your baby's needs.
Consistency and Patience
Regardless of the specific sleep training method you choose, consistency and patience are key. Sleep training can be a bumpy road, and there may be setbacks or rough nights. It's important to stay committed to your plan and accept that there will be challenges along the way. Keep in mind that most babies sleep through the night by four to nine months old, so don't get discouraged if it takes time.
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How long to let your baby cry
The Cry It Out (CIO) method is a sleep-training strategy that involves letting your baby cry themselves to sleep without any intervention from you. While it can be difficult for parents to hear their baby cry, the method doesn't involve much guesswork. The idea is to let your baby cry for as long as it takes them to fall asleep, which could be 5 or 10 minutes, or even several hours.
There are different variations of the CIO method, such as the Ferber method, which uses the graduated extinction model, and the Weissbluth method, which suggests letting babies cry for 10 to 20 minutes before sleeping. The latter method also recommends full extinction, which means allowing the baby to cry until they stop crying or fall asleep without any parent interaction or checks. This is typically recommended when the baby is 4 months old.
It's important to note that CIO methods don't involve completely ignoring your crying baby. Instead, they offer ways to transition from parental soothing to baby-led soothing. This means that you still need to actively listen to your baby's cries and determine whether they need your help. For example, you should ensure that your baby is well-fed, has a dry diaper, and isn't sick or injured before letting them cry themselves to sleep.
While the CIO method can be stressful for parents, research suggests that it can help babies learn to fall and stay asleep on their own, and it doesn't lead to long-term attachment or behavioural issues. However, it's important to remember that every baby is different, and learning to self-soothe and sleep may take longer for some. It's recommended to consult with your pediatrician or healthcare professional before starting any sleep training method to ensure it's safe and appropriate for your baby.
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Self-soothing and emotional self-regulation
The "cry-it-out" (CIO) method of sleep training involves letting a baby cry for a certain period before falling asleep without parental intervention. While some parents advocate for the CIO method, others believe that letting a baby cry is harmful. The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommends waiting to employ the CIO method until a baby is at least 4 months old, and research suggests that it is most effective after 6 months of age. According to the AAP, babies younger than 4 months old have not yet established sleep cycles. Additionally, the CIO method may be inappropriate for babies with certain health conditions or reflux.
Research suggests that there are no long-term effects from letting babies cry it out to learn to sleep and self-soothe. The AAP recommends letting children 6 months and older put themselves back to sleep without parental intervention. However, some psychologists argue that "self-soothing" is a modern term without much scientific backing. They suggest that a baby that stops crying may have simply resigned themselves to the fact that no help is coming, rather than having self-soothed. Furthermore, CIO methods may lead to unintended consequences such as premature weaning, increased crying in other situations, and a potential increased risk of SIDS.
Gentler approaches to sleep training have been found to be effective as well. One study found that gentle interventions, such as parental soothing and checking in after certain time intervals, reduced the percentage of parents reporting sleep problems by about 30% five months later. Another study found that two types of sleep training helped babies sleep better—for a few months. The first approach involved gradually increasing the amount of time a baby is allowed to cry, while the second approach involved shifting the baby's bedtime to a later time and then gradually moving it earlier.
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Frequently asked questions
Yes, according to the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP), it is okay to let babies 6 months and older put themselves to sleep without parental intervention. However, some sources suggest that it is best to wait until your baby is at least 16 weeks old and weighs at least 11 pounds before starting sleep training.
There is no strict formula for how long you should let your baby cry. It depends on what you are comfortable with as a parent. Some sources suggest intervals of between one and 10 minutes, gradually extending the time between each check-in.
Some psychologists argue that "self-soothing" is a modern term with little science behind it. One concern is that a baby that is quiet after crying may have simply accepted that no help is coming. Some researchers suggest that cry-it-out methods may lead to premature weaning, increased crying in other situations, and a potential increase in the risk of SIDS.
Yes, there are many gentler alternatives to the cry-it-out method, such as camping out, parental education, pick up put down, and bedtime routine fading. These methods can help most babies and parents get more sleep, at least for a few months.
