Colin Snow
Teaching a six-year-old to sleep can be challenging, especially if they have anxiety or fear surrounding bedtime. A consistent bedtime routine is key, and it should be calming, regular, and brief. This can include light playtime, a bath, brushing teeth, a bedtime story, and then bed. It is also important to create a safe and comfortable sleep environment, free of distractions, such as screens, which can interfere with melatonin production. Additionally, parents can praise their child when they notice them trying to improve their sleep patterns or adopting a new routine.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Sleep time | 9-11 hours each night |
| Bedtime routine | Include light playtime, bath, brushing teeth, a bedtime story, etc. |
| Wake-up time | Based on how much sleep your child needs and bedtime |
| Naps | Keep them early and short (no longer than 20 minutes) |
| Safe sleeping environment | Free of loose bedding, pillows, blankets, stuffed animals, bumpers or toys |
| Screen time | Avoid TV, video games, or phone/computer screens right before bed |
| Reading | Read to your child in the evening to allow their brain to rest |
| Anxiety and fear | Spend solo time with your child prior to bedtime to calm their fears |
| Sleep aids | Workbooks can help transition to independent sleep |
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What You'll Learn
Establish a bedtime routine
Establishing a bedtime routine is key to helping your six-year-old fall asleep and get enough rest. A solid routine can help minimize the impact of life events that disrupt sleep, such as illnesses or changes to their daily schedule.
Firstly, it is important to be consistent with your child's sleep and wake times. Keep their bedtime and wake-up times within 1-2 hours of each other every day, even on weekends and holidays. This helps to regulate their internal body clock, making it easier for them to fall asleep and wake up.
Next, create a calming bedtime routine that helps your child wind down before sleep. This routine should be regular and brief, lasting around 15-30 minutes. It can include activities such as light playtime, a warm bath, brushing teeth, and reading a bedtime story. Make sure to keep the environment dark, quiet, and slightly cool to promote better sleep.
Additionally, address any worries or fears your child may have before bedtime. Spend some special calm and loving solo time with them, offering praise and reassurance if they are feeling scared or anxious. You can also try breathing exercises or muscle relaxation techniques to help your child relax and calm their thoughts.
If your child tends to experience separation anxiety, try making their bedroom familiar and exciting. Spend time in their room during the day, allowing them to build a positive association with the space. You can also talk up the new room and show genuine excitement about them sleeping independently.
Finally, limit screen time before bed. Blue light from electronic devices can interfere with the production of melatonin, the hormone that makes us sleepy. Instead, encourage reading or other relaxing activities to help your child's brain rest and prepare for sleep.
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Create a safe sleep environment
Establishing a safe sleep environment for your six-year-old is paramount in ensuring they get a good night's rest. A safe sleep environment is not only crucial for your child's sleep quality but also plays a significant role in reducing the risk of sudden infant death syndrome by up to 50%, according to Norman Friedman, MD, director of the Children's Sleep Medicine Laboratory.
Step 1: Create a Comforting Bedroom
Make your child's bedroom a welcoming and comforting space. This can be achieved by involving your child in the process of decorating their room, allowing them to choose certain elements like the colour of the walls or their favourite bedding. This helps them develop a sense of ownership and a positive association with their bedroom. Additionally, ensure the room is well-organised and free from clutter, creating a calm and peaceful atmosphere.
Step 2: Establish a Consistent Bedtime Routine
Implement a consistent bedtime routine that starts at the same time every night. A typical routine could include light playtime, a warm bath, brushing teeth, reading a bedtime story, and then lights out. This predictability helps your child's body and mind prepare for sleep. It is also beneficial to incorporate special calm, loving, and close solo time with your child into this routine, as it can help alleviate any worries or anxieties they may have before bedtime.
Step 3: Minimise Screen Time Before Bed
Blue light from television screens, phones, or computers can interfere with the production of melatonin, the hormone responsible for making us feel sleepy. Limit screen time at least an hour before bedtime, and if possible, make the bedroom a screen-free zone. Instead, encourage reading or storytelling, which helps your child's brain relax and prepares them for sleep.
Step 4: Address Fears and Anxieties
If your child experiences bedtime fears or anxiety about being alone in the dark, address these concerns directly. Provide reassurance and praise when they confront their fears. Using a night light can also help alleviate their worries about being in the dark. Additionally, be mindful of the content they consume during the day, avoiding scary TV shows, movies, or video games that could trigger bedtime fears.
Step 5: Create a Safe Sleep Space
Ensure your child's sleep area is free from any hazards and potential choking risks. Remove any loose bedding, pillows, blankets, stuffed animals, bumpers, or toys from their sleep space. This is particularly important for younger children and helps cultivate a safe sleep environment.
By following these steps, you can create a safe and comforting sleep environment for your six-year-old, setting them up for a restful night's sleep.
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Address fears and anxieties
It is important to understand your child's fears. Give your child the chance to tell you what makes them scared at bedtime. Do not force them to talk about their fears if they are not ready. Remember that a fear that seems silly to an adult may be very real to a child.
Once you understand what your child is afraid of, it is important not to support or build up these fears. For example, if they are afraid of monsters, do not get out a monster repellent spray. These actions tend to make children think you believe in the imagined object as well. Instead, provide reassurance by making statements that communicate their safety. For example, you could say: "You are OK. We are here to make sure that you are safe. We will make sure that nothing bothers you so that you can sleep comfortably in your own bed all night."
If your child has a difficult time separating from you after being tucked in for the night, or if they call out in fear soon after bedtime, go back and ask what is wrong. It is better to join children in their room to provide comfort than to let them leave their bedroom. If possible, keep the bedroom door ajar, as leaving the door open can create a sense of comfort and alleviate fear associated with separation from parents at bedtime.
A night light may also help provide security at night, as long as the light does not interfere with your child's sleep. A pet for companionship (preferably one that does not sleep in the bed) can also provide security at night and reduce fear. If your child has a sibling, letting them share a bedroom can help reduce bedtime fears.
If your child's bedtime fears and anxieties are severe or present during the day, you should consider having a formal psychological evaluation to identify and treat anxiety.
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Encourage self-soothing
Encouraging self-soothing behaviours in your six-year-old can help minimise the number of times you need to check in on them during the night. It is common for infants and toddlers to self-soothe by sucking their thumbs or fingers, which can be very calming. As your child gets older, a soft toy or blanket they have an attachment to can aid in self-soothing.
To encourage self-soothing, it is important to establish a consistent bedtime routine. This could include activities like a warm bath, a gentle baby massage, or reading a quiet story. The goal is for your child to associate their bed with the process of falling asleep. When they wake up during the night, they are more likely to be able to fall back asleep on their own in this familiar setting.
You can also encourage your child to self-soothe by putting them to bed when they are drowsy but still awake. This allows them to initiate sleep independently in their own environment. Maintaining the same bedtime and naptime routines will also help your child develop self-soothing behaviours.
Another way to encourage self-soothing is to move bedtime feeding sessions to an earlier part of the bedtime routine. This will help your child learn to self-soothe while still ensuring they get enough food. In the beginning, you may need to stand next to the bed and offer verbal assurances or a back rub as your child learns to self-soothe without the aid of liquids and full-body human contact.
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Maintain consistent sleep and wake times
Maintaining consistent sleep and wake times is key to ensuring your six-year-old gets a good night's rest. Children need between 9 and 11 hours of sleep each night, according to the National Sleep Foundation. However, the specific amount of sleep required can vary from child to child.
To keep your child's internal body clock in a regular pattern, aim to maintain their bedtime and wake-up times within a one- to two-hour time frame every day. This includes weekends and holidays, not just school days. While it may be tempting to let your child sleep in on weekends, doing so could disrupt their sleep schedule and make it harder for them to fall asleep at their regular bedtime.
Establishing a bedtime routine is crucial for helping your six-year-old fall asleep and stick to a consistent sleep schedule. A calming bedtime routine can help to alleviate any worries or anxieties your child may have and prepare them mentally and physically for sleep. This routine should be regular and brief, lasting around 15 to 30 minutes, and should include activities that promote relaxation and signal to your child that it's time to wind down. For example, you could include light playtime, a warm bath, brushing teeth, and reading a bedtime story before turning off the lights.
Additionally, creating a sleep-friendly environment can help your child fall asleep and maintain consistent sleep times. Make sure the bedroom is dark, quiet, and slightly cool. Avoid screens before bed, as the blue light from televisions, phones, and computers can interfere with the production of melatonin, the hormone that makes us feel sleepy. Instead, encourage your child to engage in activities that allow their brain to rest, such as reading or listening to a bedtime story.
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Frequently asked questions
According to the National Sleep Foundation, school-aged children need between 9 and 11 hours of sleep each night.
It is important to establish a bedtime routine and to calm any worries or anxieties before bedtime. You can also try spending more time in your child's room during the day to help them feel safer there.
You can praise and reward your child when they are brave at bedtime. You can also try to avoid scary TV shows, movies, and computer games. Some children feel safer with a night light.
Make the bedroom a screen-free zone. Reading to your child in the evening can help their brain rest. You can also try breathing exercises or muscle relaxation techniques.
It is recommended to set a wake-up time based on how much sleep your child needs and then set a bedtime accordingly. Keep the bedtime and wake-up times within 1-2 hours of each other each day.
