Ashwin Lewis
Sleep is a precious commodity for new parents, and it can be challenging to get enough shut-eye when you have a newborn. Frequent feedings, diaper changes, and a fussy baby can make sleeping soundly at night difficult. However, getting enough sleep is crucial for new parents to fulfil their new responsibilities and feel good about parenting. This paragraph will provide an introduction to the topic of how to sleep better with a newborn and offer strategies for new parents to optimise their sleep during this exhausting but exciting time.
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What You'll Learn
Ask for help from friends and family
Sleep is a challenge for new parents, with frequent feedings, diaper changes, and a baby that wakes up several times a night. It is important to prioritise your sleep and rest as a new parent, and asking for help from friends and family is a great way to get some much-needed shut-eye.
First, it is important to recognise that this is a common issue for new parents and that you are not alone. Many friends and family members will be willing to help, and it is beneficial to be honest about your needs and ask for support. If you have a partner, they can share the feeds if you are formula feeding, or help with nappies and dressing if you are breastfeeding. They can also take the baby to another room after a nighttime feeding, allowing you to get more sleep.
Friends and relatives can be a great source of help, whether it is by picking up groceries, doing household chores, or holding the baby while you nap. They may even be willing to stay with you for a few days or nights to help with diaper changes and feedings. This can be especially helpful if you are a single parent or your partner is unable to help.
It can be difficult to ask for help, but it is important to remember that your loved ones likely want to support you. Be specific about what you need, whether it is a few hours of sleep, a home-cooked meal, or someone to talk to. Most people will be happy to help and will understand the challenges of having a newborn.
Finally, remember that this phase will pass. As your baby gets older, they will sleep for longer periods, and you will eventually be able to get a full night's rest again. In the meantime, asking for help from friends and family can make a big difference in your sleep and overall well-being.
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Prioritise sleep over chores
Sleep deprivation is a common issue for new parents, and it can lead to problems with concentration, low mood, and an increased risk of postpartum depression. Prioritising sleep over chores is an important strategy for new parents to combat this.
Newborns wake up frequently to feed, no matter the time of day, and require diaper changes, making it difficult for parents to get a full night's sleep. Newborns also do not yet have a sense of day and night, and it may take a few weeks for their brains to differentiate between the two. As such, it is recommended that parents sleep when their baby sleeps. While it may be tempting to use this time to do chores, getting rest is crucial for new parents.
One strategy is to share nighttime feedings with your partner, allowing both parents to get at least one stretch of solid sleep. If you are breastfeeding, your partner can still help by bringing the baby to you for feeding and then getting them back to sleep in another room. Alternatively, you can pump breast milk before going to bed, allowing your partner to feed the baby while you get a longer stretch of uninterrupted sleep.
If you are a single parent, consider asking a friend or relative to help look after the baby while you nap or stay with you for a few days to provide support and allow you to get more sleep. It is also important to remember that this phase of frequent night-time wakings will not last forever, and as babies get older, they will sleep for longer periods.
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Avoid caffeine and electronics before bed
Sleep is extremely important for new parents, but it can be hard to come by with a newborn. Newborns wake up frequently to feed and can make it nearly impossible for their parents to sleep soundly at night.
To improve your sleep, it is important to avoid caffeine. Caffeine is a stimulant that can interfere with your sleep cycle. Instead of caffeine, try a big glass of water accompanied by a quick, nutritious snack. This can give you an extra boost to make it through those long, sleep-deprived nights.
It is also important to avoid using electronics before bed. Using mobile phones, tablets, and computers at night can interfere with your total sleep time. Instead, try to do something relaxing for half an hour before bed, such as soaking in a hot bath.
If you are feeling tired and struggling to cope, talk to a GP or health visitor. You can also ask friends and family for help. They may be able to hold the baby while you nap or help with diaper changes and feedings.
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Optimise your baby's sleep environment
Newborns wake up frequently to feed, no matter the time of day. They also don't have a sense of day and night, so it may take a few weeks for them to settle into a routine. In the meantime, there are some things you can do to optimise their sleep environment:
- Keep things quiet and calm during nighttime feeds and diaper changes. Keep the lights low and avoid playing with or talking to your baby. This will help them understand that nighttime is for sleeping.
- Let your baby fall asleep in their crib at night so they associate it with sleep.
- Don't keep your baby awake during the day in the hopes that they'll sleep better at night. Well-rested infants tend to sleep better at night.
- If your baby is fussy, it's okay to rock, cuddle, and sing to them as they settle down.
- Always place your baby on their back to sleep, not on their stomach or side. Use a firm, flat sleep surface and cover the mattress with a sheet that fits snugly.
- Keep soft toys, pillows, blankets, sheets, quilts, comforters, sheepskins, and bumper pads out of your baby's sleep area.
- Dress your baby for the room temperature and don't overbundle them. Avoid covering their head while they sleep, and watch for signs of overheating, such as sweating or feeling hot to the touch.
- If you're comfortable, consider "babywearing" with a sling or carrier during the day. This can help soothe your baby and promote better sleep at night.
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Manage expectations and your baby's sleep schedule
Newborns follow their own schedule and don't yet have a sense of day and night. They wake up frequently to eat, no matter the time. In the first couple of weeks to months, you and your baby will begin to settle into a routine. During this time, it may be helpful to keep things quiet and calm during middle-of-the-night feedings and diaper changes. Try to keep the lights low and avoid playing with or talking to your baby. This will help them understand that nighttime is for sleeping.
Newborns take frequent naps lasting anywhere from 2 to 4 hours, for a total of 16 to 18 hours of sleep each day. However, this sleep is often spread out throughout the day and night, and newborns rarely sleep for more than 4 hours at a time. As your baby gets older, they will start to sleep for longer stretches at night.
- Understand that newborns don't have predictable sleep schedules, and the timing and duration of their sleep can vary significantly.
- Keep things quiet and calm during nighttime feedings and diaper changes to help your baby associate nighttime with sleep.
- Try to let your baby fall asleep in their crib at night to reinforce the association between the crib and sleep.
- Avoid keeping your baby up during the day in the hopes that they will sleep better at night. Overly tired infants often have more trouble sleeping at night.
- If your baby is fussy, it's okay to rock, cuddle, and sing to them as they settle down.
- Newborns should be awakened to feed every 3-4 hours until they show good weight gain, which usually happens within the first few weeks. After that, it's okay to let them sleep for longer periods at night.
- If you are struggling with sleep deprivation, consider asking a friend or relative to help out by holding the baby while you nap or taking turns feeding the baby at night.
- Prioritize your sleep and well-being over household tasks. Use the time when your baby is sleeping to rest instead of doing chores.
- If you are breastfeeding, your partner or loved one can still help by bringing the baby to you for feeding and then getting them back to sleep in another room.
- Consider introducing a bottle when your baby is around three to four weeks old to allow for longer stretches of sleep. However, proceed with caution as this may exacerbate issues with breast milk supply or engorgement.
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Frequently asked questions
It's important to remember that the first few months of a baby's life can be the hardest for parents when it comes to sleep. Newborns follow their own schedule and don't yet have a sense of day and night, so they wake up frequently to eat no matter the time. Here are some strategies to help you sleep better:
- Sleep when your baby sleeps. It can be tempting to use this time to catch up with chores, but getting rest is more important.
- If you have a partner, ask them to help. If you're formula feeding, they could share the feeds. If you're breastfeeding, they can help with nappy changes or other tasks so you can get more sleep.
- Avoid caffeine, as it can interfere with your sleep cycle.
- Don't use electronics before bed, as the blue light can disrupt your sleep.
In the early months, it's normal for newborns to need help falling asleep and staying asleep, and they won't have predictable sleep schedules yet. Here are some tips to help your newborn sleep better:
- Keep things quiet and calm during middle-of-the-night feedings and nappy changes. Keep the lights low and avoid playing or talking with your baby to send the message that nighttime is for sleeping.
- Let your baby fall asleep in their crib at night so they associate it with sleep time.
- Newborns should be put to sleep on their back on a firm, flat sleep surface covered with a fitted sheet. Remove any plush toys, pillows, blankets, or other items from the crib to prevent SIDS.
- Dress your baby appropriately for the room temperature to avoid overheating.
Here are some strategies specifically for new parents to get more sleep:
- Ask friends or relatives for help. They can assist with tasks like grocery shopping or holding the baby while you nap.
- Take daytime naps when your baby sleeps. Even short naps of 15-30 minutes can make a difference.
- On nights when you need undisturbed sleep, have your partner or a loved one sleep in a separate room with the baby. They can bring the baby to you for feeding and then get them back to sleep.
- Introduce a bottle when your baby is 3-4 weeks old if breastfeeding is going well and they are gaining weight appropriately. This allows your partner to share nighttime feedings and gives you a longer stretch of sleep.
Sleep deprivation can lead to problems with concentration, low mood, and an increased risk of postpartum depression. If you're feeling extremely tired and struggling to cope, it's important to seek help. Here are some signs that you may need support:
- You're unable to sleep even when your baby is asleep.
- You feel tired all the time, and it's impacting your ability to enjoy activities you normally like.
- You're feeling down, hopeless, or bad-tempered.
If you experience any of these symptoms, talk to your GP or a health visitor as soon as possible.
