Miya Pearson
Settling a newborn to sleep can be challenging, and it's important to remember that all babies are unique and will have different sleep patterns. In the early days, it is common for newborns to fall asleep while being held and then wake up when put down in their cot. Newborns do not distinguish between night and day, so it's the parents' job to establish a good day-night cycle. Responsive settling is a popular technique that involves looking out for signs that your baby is getting tired and then putting them down in a comfortable, calm, and relaxed state. Hands-on settling, which often involves gentle patting and shushing, can also help your baby get used to falling asleep in their cot.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Sleep patterns | Newborns sleep when they are tired and do not distinguish between night and day. |
| Sleep cycles | It is the parent's job to get them into a good day-night cycle. |
| Sleep duration | Newborns invariably wake up repeatedly in the night for the first few months. |
| Sleep environment | A safe sleep environment reduces the risk of sudden unexpected death in infancy (SUDI) and sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS). |
| Sleep techniques | Hands-on settling, settling in arms, verbal reassurance, responsive settling, transition settling, and co-bedding are some techniques to help newborns sleep. |
| Self-soothing | Babies who self-soothe sleep for longer. |
| Sleep routine | Building a sleep routine can help newborns settle and sleep. |
| Sleep cues | Look out for sleep cues and respond to them to help your newborn settle. |
| Sleep safety | Swaddling may help newborns settle, but it is important to ensure they do not get too hot or restrict their movement. |
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What You'll Learn
Recognise sleep cues and patterns
All babies are different, and sleep patterns can vary a lot. Newborns do not distinguish between night and day, so they sleep when they are tired. It is the parents' job to get them into a good day-night cycle. In the first six months of life, babies need to feed often during the day and night to get enough food for growth and development. For most babies, 'sleeping through the night' and settling by themselves comes later, when they are developmentally ready.
Babies need to learn the skill of going to sleep. Responsive settling is a sensitive way to settle your baby when they need help going to sleep. It gives your baby the comfort they need to feel calm, settled and ready for sleep, especially if they are tired and upset. Responsive settling also gives your baby the sense of safety and security they need for healthy development and wellbeing. Feeling safe and secure can help with independent settling and sleep later on when your baby is developmentally ready.
Babies under 6 months old may need more help to go to sleep than an older baby. It's normal for very young babies to fall asleep when they're being nursed or fed. If you always nurse, feed or rock your baby, they will find it harder to learn to sleep on their own. It's a good idea to feed a young baby just after they wake up instead.
Babies from 0 to 3 months might start showing tired signs after 30 minutes of being awake. From 3 to 6 months, they might be tired after 1.5 to 3 hours of being awake. If your baby has been awake for longer than 30 minutes (newborn) or longer than 90 minutes (3 to 6 months), they are likely to be tired.
When your baby is tired, they show signs or cues that they are tired. If you learn to recognise these signs, you can encourage your baby to go to sleep at the right time. Try to learn your baby's tired signs. Younger babies need more sleep than older babies and can get overtired easily. Your baby will probably sleep best when it is darker and quiet. Try to be patient, flexible and realistic when helping your baby learn sleep skills. Listen to your baby's cry and what they are trying to tell you. Respond in a calm and confident way to help your baby relax.
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Hands-on settling
- Face your baby away from you, lying on their side in their cot. Place your hand gently on their shoulder. Cup your other hand and gently pat your baby slowly on their bottom or thigh. Make the patting as rhythmic as possible – for example, about the same rate as your heartbeat. Sing a quiet, soothing song to help you find a rhythm. If you think singing might disturb your baby, sing or count in your head to keep your patting steady. Or try saying ‘shhh’ on each pat. As you feel your baby relax, roll them onto their back and leave the room.
- Gently rock your baby or sway from side to side. Walk around in slow circles.
- Sing softly to your baby, or make gentle ‘sh, sh’ sounds.
- Rhythmic patting or rocking can be very soothing for a baby. However, if you start to feel angry or upset, you might pat or rock your baby too hard or too fast. If this happens, it’s best to put your baby in a safe place, like their cot, and take a moment to calm yourself.
Remember, in the first 6 months of life, babies need to feed often during the day and night to get enough nourishment for growth and development. Most babies will not "sleep through the night" or settle by themselves until later, when they are developmentally ready.
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Responsive settling
Babies give cues or signals when they're tired. Crying is a sign of being overtired. Other signs of tiredness include grizzling, yawning, clenched fists, jerky movements, and blank staring. If your baby gets overtired, it can be harder for them to settle. Before putting your baby down to sleep, make sure they are comfortable, calm, and relaxed.
There are several ways to be responsive to your baby while settling them to sleep:
- Settling in arms: This involves holding and soothing your baby when they're ready for sleep. You can gently rock your baby or sway from side to side, walk around in slow circles, or pat your baby's bottom rhythmically. Sing softly to your baby or make gentle 'shh' sounds. When your baby is asleep, you can gently put them on their back into their cot or onto another safe sleep surface.
- Hands-on settling: This can help your baby get used to falling asleep in their cot. Face your baby away from you, lying on their side. Place your hand gently on your baby's shoulder and cup your other hand, then pat your baby gently and slowly on the bottom or thigh. Make the patting as rhythmic as possible, perhaps by singing a quiet, soothing song or counting in your head to keep the patting steady. As your baby relaxes, roll them onto their back and leave the room.
- Verbal reassurance: Use a soft night light to help your baby recognize their surroundings when they wake up overnight. This helps them feel safer, so they're more likely to settle by themselves. Use a monitor to call to your baby before you go to them. Try wrapping your baby in a lightweight cotton or muslin wrap for sleep. However, note that wrapping is not safe for babies who are starting to roll onto their tummies.
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Self-soothing
To help your baby self-soothe, it is important to first create a safe sleeping environment, establish a routine, and decide on a bedtime. A safe sleep environment reduces the risk of sudden unexpected death in infancy (SUDI) and sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS). During the night, keep the room dark or dimly lit and quiet. Use a dim light when you attend to your baby during the night, and respond to your baby's cries as soon as possible.
Once you have established a safe and consistent sleep environment, you can begin to introduce self-settling techniques. One technique is the 'pick-up, put-down settling method'. Another is the 'shush-pat settling method', which involves rhythmic, gentle patting with your baby in their cot. Face your baby away from you, lying on their side, and place your hand gently on their shoulder. Cup your other hand, and pat your baby gently and slowly on the bottom or thigh. Make the patting as rhythmic as possible, for example, by singing a quiet, soothing song or counting in your head to keep the rhythm steady.
It is important to note that if your baby is falling asleep while drinking from a bottle or breastfeeding, they are not actually self-soothing or learning to self-soothe. By moving the bedtime feeding session to an earlier part of the bedtime routine, you can encourage your baby to learn to self-soothe while still ensuring they get enough food.
Many parents start noticing their infants demonstrating self-soothing behaviors by 3 to 4 months, and by 6 months, most infants are capable of going 8 or more hours without needing a feed at night. It is ideal to encourage self-soothing behaviors before separation anxiety kicks in, usually around 8 to 9 months.
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Safe sleep practices
A newborn baby's sleep pattern can vary, with some sleeping for long periods and others in short bursts. Some babies sleep through the night, while others don't for a long time. It is important to remember that your baby will have their own unique pattern of sleep and waking, which may not align with your sleep schedule.
Safe Sleep Environment
Creating a safe sleep environment is crucial to reducing the risk of Sudden Unexpected Infant Death (SUID), which includes Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS) and fatal sleep accidents. Here are some guidelines:
- Always place your baby on their back to sleep, never on their side or stomach.
- Use a firm, flat, and level sleep surface, such as a crib, bassinet, or portable play yard with a tight-fitting sheet. The mattress should return to its original shape quickly when pressed on.
- Remove all soft bedding, comforters, pillows, loose sheets, blankets, sheepskins, toys, positioners, and bumpers from the crib or sleep area. These items pose a risk of suffocation and strangulation.
- Ensure the crib spindles are no wider than 2-3/8 inches apart, and the sides do not drop down.
- Do not let your baby sleep on adult beds, couches, armchairs, or other soft sleep surfaces. These surfaces increase the risk of SIDS and accidental suffocation.
- Avoid sleeping in the same bed as your baby (bed-sharing). Bed-sharing increases the risk of SUIDS and accidental suffocation.
- Room-sharing is recommended. Keep your baby's sleep space separate but close by, such as a bassinette or crib next to your bed. This makes feeding, comforting, and monitoring easier.
- Use a soft night light to help your baby recognize their surroundings when they wake up, promoting a sense of safety and encouraging independent settling.
- Consider using a sleep sack or wearable blanket instead of loose blankets to keep your baby warm.
- Avoid using products that claim to reduce the risk of SUIDS, such as wedges or baby positioners, unless prescribed by a doctor.
Responsive Settling
Responsive settling involves providing comfort and reassurance to help your baby feel calm and ready for sleep. Here are some tips:
- Recognize the signs of tiredness in your baby, such as grizzling or crying.
- Use hands-on settling techniques, such as gentle and rhythmic patting or rocking. Face your baby away from you, lying on their side, and pat them slowly on the bottom or thigh.
- Provide verbal reassurance by saying "I'm here. Time to sleep" or making "sh, sh" sounds. You can also sing or hum softly.
- If your baby is very upset, it's okay to give them a cuddle. Repeat this pattern until they calm down, and then put them back in their cot.
- If you start to feel angry or upset, take a moment to calm yourself. Hand your baby to your partner or a trusted caregiver if possible.
- Encourage independent settling by putting your baby in their cot when they are tired but still awake. This helps them learn to settle on their own.
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Frequently asked questions
Responsive settling is a way to help your baby feel calm and ready for sleep. This includes hands-on settling, such as gentle rhythmic patting, and settling in arms. You can also try verbal reassurance, such as saying "I'm here. Time to sleep" or making "sh, sh" sounds.
Babies aged 0-3 months might start showing signs of tiredness after 30 minutes of being awake. From 3-6 months, they might be tired after 1.5-3 hours of being awake. Signs of tiredness include grizzling, yawning, and rubbing their eyes.
It is important to place your baby on their back to sleep and to avoid co-sleeping in an adult bed, on a chair, or a couch. Swaddling may help your baby settle, but it is important to stop once they start trying to roll over. A soft night light can also help your baby feel safer and recognise the bedroom when they wake up.
Putting your baby to bed when they are sleepy but still awake can help them learn to associate falling asleep with being in bed. This is called self-soothing, and babies who self-soothe tend to sleep for longer.
If your baby is crying, pick them up, comfort them, and feed them if they are hungry. If they are very upset, it is okay to give them a cuddle. You can also try using a dummy to help them settle.
