Miya Pearson
The Supernanny sleep training technique, also known as the Stay in Bed technique, is a popular method aimed at helping children sleep independently and throughout the night. The technique involves creating a calm bedtime atmosphere and repeatedly putting children back to bed without any talking or eye contact after the third time they get up. While some parents have found success with this method, others have expressed concerns about its effectiveness and potential stress. The key to success appears to lie in consistency, commitment, and preparing for setbacks.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Name of Technique | Back to Bed Method, Stay in Bed Technique, Sleep Separation Technique |
| How it works | The child is put to bed and if they get up, they are returned to bed with a reminder that it's bedtime. No talking or eye contact is made after the third time. |
| Time taken to work | 3-7 nights |
| Effectiveness | Mixed reviews, with some parents saying it worked and others saying it didn't. |
| Age suitability | Babies (6 months and above), toddlers, and older children |
| Modifications | Using a sleep training clock, hanging fairy lights and lanterns, and using a safety gate |
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What You'll Learn
Controlled crying
The first step is to put your child in their cot while they are still awake and sleepy. Then, say goodnight and leave the room. If your baby cries, leave them for two minutes before going back to let them know they are okay. Settle them down, say goodnight again, and leave the room. This time, wait for five minutes before repeating the process, adding a couple of minutes each time. It is important to make sure your child is not hungry, thirsty, ill, or overwrought before using this technique.
Some parents find that controlled crying works relatively quickly, often within three weeks. Research shows that babies with a settled bedtime routine had fewer behaviour problems as babies and toddlers. However, it is important to keep in mind that any method can work for some babies but not for others, and there are other gentler sleep-training methods available.
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Supernanny's Stay in Bed technique
The Stay in Bed technique is one of Jo's most popular techniques from Supernanny. This technique is meant to help children who get out of bed stay in their own rooms and sleep throughout the night.
The technique involves the following steps:
- Allow your child to wind down and prepare for bedtime. This can be done by playing a board/card game or telling stories.
- Before putting your child to bed, create a calm and soothing atmosphere.
- Ensure your child has no reason to get up, for example, by making sure they have been to the toilet and had some water.
- Make it clear that you expect them to stay in bed.
- If your child gets up, remind them that it's bedtime, lead them back to bed, give them a kiss and a cuddle, and leave the bedroom.
- The second time, use a firmer voice and make the kiss and cuddle brief.
- The third and subsequent times, say nothing at all as you lead them back to bed, tuck them in, and leave the room.
It is important to be consistent and follow these steps to create the right environment for your child to stay in their own bed. While it can be challenging, the technique has worked for many parents, with improvements often seen within 7-10 days.
It is worth noting that the technique may need to be modified to suit the needs of your child. For example, Jo modified the technique for the Merrill Family, adding steps to create a calm atmosphere and reassure the children that they were safe.
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Supernanny's Back to Bed technique
The "Stay in Bed" technique, also known as the "Back to Bed" technique, is one of Jo Frost's most popular techniques from her show Supernanny. It is meant to help children who get out of bed stay in their own rooms and sleep throughout the night. This technique is often compared to the Sleep Separation technique.
The technique involves creating a calming bedtime routine and making sure your child has no reason to get up, such as hunger or thirst, before putting them to bed. The first time they get up, remind them that it's bedtime, lead them back to bed, and give them a kiss and a cuddle. The second time, do the same but with a firmer voice and a shorter kiss and cuddle. From the third time onwards, say nothing and make no eye contact as you lead them back to bed and leave the room.
It is important to be consistent and follow the steps, and soon you should create the right environment for your child to stay in their own bed all night. This technique may take time and can be distressing for both parents and children, but it has shown results for some families. For example, one parent reported that their child now only gets up three times at most on willful days, and most nights they go straight to bed.
However, it is important to note that this technique may not work for all children, especially those with more complex needs. For example, Jo Frost modified the technique when working with the Merrill Family, whose children had nightmares due to trauma. She added steps to create a calm atmosphere with dim fairy lights and lanterns and reassured the children that they were safe.
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Supernanny's Sleep Separation technique
The Supernanny Sleep Separation technique is a bedtime strategy for younger children, usually around 2-3 years old. It is designed to help children fall asleep independently in their own bedroom, without needing a parent present. This technique is particularly useful for children who are struggling to sleep on their own or stay in bed at bedtime.
The Sleep Separation technique involves the following steps:
- Establish a calm bedtime routine: This includes activities such as reading or quiet play before bedtime, rather than energetic or competitive games.
- Encourage independent sleep: When it's time for bed, the parent should sit in the child's room without making direct eye contact. This allows the child to recognise the parent's presence while also understanding that it's time to sleep.
- Set boundaries: If the child gets up, the parent should remind them to go back to bed and explain that they should not get out of bed unless there is a good reason.
- Be consistent: If the child starts to cry, the parent should remain in the room but avoid making eye contact or engaging in conversation. It's important to endure the crying until the child eventually calms down and falls asleep.
- Stick with it: This technique may take several nights or even a week to be fully effective. It requires consistency and commitment from the parent, and it's important to realise that it might get worse before it gets better.
The Sleep Separation technique has received mixed reviews from parents. Some have found it successful in helping their children sleep independently, reducing bedtime struggles, and improving their own sleep quality. However, others have expressed concerns about the potential stress and cruelty of letting their child cry. It's important to note that each child is unique, and different techniques may work better for some children than others.
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Supernanny's modified technique
The "Stay in Bed" technique is one of Supernanny Jo's most popular techniques. This technique is meant to help children who get out of bed to stay in their own rooms and sleep throughout the night.
The first time your child gets out of bed, return them to bed and say in a calm, low voice, "It’s bedtime, darling". Take them by the hand, tuck them in, and leave. The second time, return them to bed with a short tone, saying, "It's bedtime". The third time, return them to bed without saying anything. For every successive time, repeat the third step. If your child throws a fit, ignore it and leave them in bed. They will eventually wear themselves out and fall asleep. If your child continues misbehaving and disturbing the household, speak to them about how you will take away privileges if they do not go to bed.
To prepare your child for bedtime, allow them to wind down. This can be done by playing a board/card game or telling stories. Before putting your child to bed, create a calm and soothing atmosphere by turning off electronics, dimming lights, closing blinds, and using lower, calmer voices. Begin the 3 B's: give your child a bath (or have them take it themselves if they are old enough), help them brush their teeth (or do it themselves if old enough), and read them a book. Eliminate any excuses the child may have (e.g. a glass of water or a night light) and place your child in bed. Kiss them goodnight and leave the room.
It is important to be consistent and committed to the Stay in Bed technique, and it may get worse before it gets better. Usually, the technique works within 7 to 10 days, and you will see big improvements if you have been keeping a sleep diary.
In some cases, Supernanny has had to modify the technique to suit the needs of the child. For example, with the Merrill family, Jo added steps to the technique to help two adopted children who had nightmares. She added dim fairy lights and lanterns to create a calm atmosphere and had the children help with this task. She reassured the children that they were safe, put them to bed, and if they got out of bed, she gave short verbal reassurances and put them back to bed without raising her voice.
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Frequently asked questions
The Supernanny sleep training technique, also known as the "Stay in Bed" technique, is meant to help children who get out of bed stay in their rooms and sleep throughout the night. It involves creating a calming bedtime routine, putting your child to bed, and then sitting in the room with them without making eye contact. If your child gets out of bed, you return them to bed and tell them calmly that it's bedtime. This process is repeated, and you gradually increase the amount of time you leave them to cry before going back in.
It usually takes around 7 to 10 days for the Supernanny sleep training technique to be effective. However, some parents have reported that it took them 3 to 7 nights to see results, while others have said it took 2 weeks or more.
The Supernanny sleep training technique can help children learn to sleep independently and stay in their own beds throughout the night. This means that parents can also get a full night's rest. The technique can be particularly useful for children who have previously had no boundaries around bedtimes.
Some parents have reported that the Supernanny sleep training technique did not work for their children, even after weeks of trying. Others have found it stressful and exhausting, especially in the early stages. The technique may also be challenging for children who are particularly stubborn or willful.
Yes, there are other sleep training techniques that can be used. These include the Sleep Separation technique, which is similar to the "Stay in Bed" technique, and the Controlled Crying approach, where parents gradually increase the amount of time they leave their child to cry before going to comfort them. Other alternatives include using a sleep training clock or allowing children to wind down and prepare for bedtime through activities such as reading or playing games.
